1 EPIC REASON WHY FRANCE ALWAYS PULLS AT MY HEARTSTRINGS
I am French on paper, Malawian by birth and Polish by heart. Each time I travel to Malawi from Poland, I have to pay visa fees when I am about to enter the country in which I was born.
Poland has been my home for over 12 years now. I resided in France for a decade after living in Malawi for the first 19 years of my life. My gratitude for these countries is measured in equal parts.
Malawi gave me my primary and secondary school education. France moulded me into an analytical thinker. Poland gave me the courage and freedom to pursue my career interests. Most of all, it is in Poland that I have found peace and equilibrium of the soul.
In Malawi, I have relatives and ancestral roots. My husband is French and his family remains in France. Poland is where I prefer to raise my own family. I have strong ties to all these countries and I cannot give precedence to one country over another.
As I become older, I feel a deep love for each of these countries. This strong affection manifests itself in different ways but this has not always been the case.
Formerly, I nurtured a love and hate relationship with all these countries because I focused on their weaknesses and not their strengths. It is an unfortunate human trait to focus on what is absent or lacking. We expend so much energy to get what we do not have instead of directing our efforts towards keeping what we already have.
During the time I lived in France, I made tremendous efforts to learn French and become an integral member of society. However, I never felt French enough and French people always reminded me of that. I became bitter and resented this rejection.
This clouded my vision and only saw what was missing. Instead of focusing on all the good that the country could offer, I dwelled on this dearth of recognition.
When I moved to Poland because of my husband’s job, I felt this lack of consideration for my culture even more. In 2011, I had a major identity crisis. Who was I? What were my motivations? What was my purpose? Was I still hundred percent Malawian? Had I become French because of my passport? Why did I like being in Poland when I obviously could never become Polish?
A few years ago, I got mad at a German immigration officer when he told me that it made no sense to say that I was going home to Malawi. “You say that you live and work in Poland; you have a French passport and yet you say you are Malawian!”
To let me through, I had to answer a question in the Polish language “Jak się masz?” (How are you?) to which I gave a resounding “Dobrze!” (Fine!). The officer smiled and wished me good luck on my next leg of the journey.
Little did this officer know that one day I would be learning German and speaking his language! Well, that is a topic worth having its own blog post!
Over the years, I have learnt that home is where the heart is. I have grown to love all these places despite their shortcomings. Whenever I wake up, I am happy to have the opportunity to enjoy what each country has to offer on a daily basis.
My vocabulary is interpersed with Polish, English, Chichewa, and French words. Nowadays, I just focus on what is good for me and I have discarded everything that is detrimental to my life. Increasingly, I embrace the fact that multiculturalism and multilingualism continuously enrich my life.
If I could, I would have three separate websites dedicated to all these countries. I chose to focus on the African continent because it is the most lacking and needs most of my love and efforts.
My dream is that one day I can walk on the streets of Blantyre or Lilongwe and enjoy their architectural beauty or natural treasures. I want to be able to think of my own country, not as a place of lack, but a place of beauty and love and strong family ties!
This is why when I now go to France, I am able to see and enjoy its unparrelled beauty. The fact that I no longer have any expectations allows me to go beyond the racial divide.
Gradually, I have realised that it is doing myself a great injustice to focus on things I have little to no control over. Frankly speaking, I’d rather devote myself to productive endeavours than dwelling on real or perceived injustices.
As a matter of fact I do not want my life to be overtaken by feelings of envy or anger. We only have one life and there is so much beauty and joy in the world! I will not let my eyes be swamped by antagonism and hideousness. Not in my lifetime!
Today, my feelings for France are not of animosity, recrimination or retribution. Growingly, I feel more and more admiration for what this country has been able to accomplish over the course of its history.
French people love quality and strive to apply this principle in every aspect of their lives. They do not settle for less and continuously demand to be treated better.
They want to eat excellent food, wear first-rate clothes, go to state-of-the-art hospitals, learn in reputable institutions, work in humane conditions, drive on pothole-free roads, live in agreeable houses, spend time in pleasant surroundings, etc.
French people are hard-working and toil to maintain their high and well-deserved standards of life.
France continues to inspire me and will do so for years to come.
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About the Author
Thandi Ngwira Gatignol is the founder of Learn English With Africa. She was born on June 11th, 1981 in Blantyre, Malawi. When she was 19, she left her country of birth for France. She currently lives with her two daughters and husband in Poland.
Thandi holds a Bachelor’s degree in English studies obtained at the Université Paris X Nanterre in France and a Certificate in Journalism from Malawi. She has taught English as a French Ministry of Education certified teacher both in France and in Poland. She speaks six languages fluently, including French, Polish and Italian. She is now learning Kiswahili, German and Spanish. Salt No More is her debut novel and you can find her other books here on the website or on Amazon.
Blog Article: France!—5 Epic Reasons Why I Keep Falling in Love with this Country, Over and Over Again (Level B1-B2)❤️© Learn English With Africa, July 2023
